bothering me

I know something that i really dont wonna know, but i promised that i wouldnt tell anyone about it. I cant have........ get mad at me, if i told they would know it was me. I love....... way to much to seat here and take this resk and lose......!! How did i get my self into something like this, i should have listened when they told me that i wouldnt wonna know, that i would get mad or upset. I really dont know how i feel at this point, I think that i am really just covused and dont wonna hurt anyone anymore. It scares me every day that i could lose...... and that something bad will happen. How do i just make all this better, do i just let it go and act like i dont know wats goin on or say something?